Day 13 No fear August 24, 2019 10:58
Fear. Just the mere mention makes me afraid.
Perhaps fear in of itself is not always so bad. Fear can prompt our bodies to respond to the necessary action of moving us out of danger and into safety. Fear can even be a little exhilarating sometimes.
I recall the zip line excursion on the Big Island in Hawaii. I was buckled in to a small swing like seat that seemed hardly attached to a simple cable that extended 2000 feet from end to end and 450 feet above the earth below where I sped past a 250 ft. waterfall. Exhilarating but SCARY! Or the time I rode the raging rollercoaster and plummeted 147 feet to the bottom. A scary movie can conjure up some exciting terror -if you're into that kind of thing- no thank you.
But there's another fear that can paralyze me, keep my head and heart spinning with anticipation of something terrible- the kind of fear that is initially hardly noticeable and then eventually settles into my body and starts to take over- a toxic slow drip tonic who's purpose is to play havoc in my body, mind and spirit.
Here’s the conversation in action,
Me: "I'm afraid there's something wrong with me. My heart is skipping beats! What is going on? This feels bad!"
Fear : "Oh no! this is not good! This is bad Dana. You're right. There is something wrong with you! Terribly wrong! You should be afraid. You will end up being a huge burden to others just like you were when you were young...amongst other unbearable aftereffects ! What if... "
When I choose to allow to dialogue with fear it disguises itself as the truth that directs my life and I make the decision to surpass the loving, sacrificial guarantee that God is using all things in my life for good. Even the things that rattle me to my core. It really is my choice to make.
Then I hear the Spirit say, which is refreshing:
The Spirit: “I understand you are afraid. I'm sorry you feel bad. Thank you for telling me. I already knew you felt this way but now that you've admitted it to yourself and to me I can help you. I am so happy you're coming to me for help. Now you can hear me respond to you because you are intentionally seeking me with grand expectation that I will answer you. Yes. I'm on it. Let me help you. I've got this. We've got this. You are never a burden to me. You're a treasure. These problems in your life, the fears that you asses as scary and bad, I use as opportunities for you to learn, to see good and bring growth and purpose to your life. I use them to show you that you can trust me. I use all things for good remember?"
Me: "Yes, I know you say that! But what if it's really bad?!"
Fear: "Of course it's really bad! You can't believe that. You're doomed!"
The Spirit counters the offer.
The Spirit: "And what if it's not? And if it is? This is your life just the way it was meant to be. I will help you. I will be with you. It's my promise to you. Even though you walk through the valley of the shadow of death, fear no evil Dana, for I am with you sweet daughter.
Me: "Because whatever I am facing you have it all? and this is my life..."
The Spirit responds: "Always. You are my creation. My beautiful daughter whom I am pleased with and love with all of my heart- so much that I sacrificed everything I ever had for you and would do again and again and again to prove it to you."
Fear: “I'm outa here."
Let our faith be bigger than our fear.
Don’t panic. I’m with you. There’s no need to fear for I’m your God. I’ll give you strength. I’ll help you. I’ll hold you steady, keep a firm grip on you.